Chapter Thirteen - Struggle (a)

As I wait for Nana, I have indulged myself with this giant cake that was in the middle of the table near Nana’s station. It was too delicious to share, I would prefer to eat it on my own. I was too occupied with the cake when a voice suddenly asked from behind me, “Robert, what are you doing?

I turned around to see Nana, shocked. “Oh, hello, Nana,” I greeted as I moved back an inch.

She moved closer and an expression of horror rose on her face. Her eyes widened as she asked, “Robert, what did you do to this cake?

“It was on the table and nobody was taking notice of it so I thought I could have a few bites,” I replied. “Would you like some?

“Nobody is touching it because no one was supposed to touch it!” she answered, examining the whole cake.

“What do you mean? Isn’t this supposed to be for dinner?” I asked, baffled.

“This was for dinner but this was for the lords! Your father invited them over to celebrate their success on their trade,” she explained.

“Oh! I didn’t mean to!” I stood in a panic. “I’m very sorry, Nana, I didn’t know! I’ll fix it right now!” I continued, trying to grab the cake, which Nana quickly moved away from me.

She let out a sigh. “There’s no need for you to worry, Robert,” she walked up to me and rubbed my back in comfort. “I’ll have the bakers make a new one. You can finish the cake if you want to.” She turned to the bakers, “William! Philip! Kindly make another cake and please put a sign that it mustn’t be touched.” The bakers nodded and went straight to work. She sat beside me, “And since you were already enjoying yourself, how about I join you?

“Allow me to get you a plate and fork,” I smiled, standing up. I walked to the cupboard behind us and grabbed what we needed. As I returned to the table, I put the plate and fork in front of her.

“Thank you, son,” she said as she took the knife and took a slice from the cake.

I sat back down. “I think Elizabeth would like some of this when she wakes up,” I suggested. “Can we have some delivered to my room? That’s where Elizabeth is sleeping.

“That’s a good idea, Robert! We can’t finish this whole cake by ourselves, anyway. Krisha?” she called out to the maid sweeping the floor. She put the broom on the side and approached us. “Would you be so kind to get me a plate and fork?” Nana smiled at her.

Krisha nodded and proceeded to do what Nana asked for.

“How’s your day so far?” I asked.

“If we’re going to talk about what I usually do here in the castle then I would say, nothing exciting,” she giggled before sharing a laugh. “Are you asking about Mallory’s well-being as well?

I sighed before a nod, taking another bite from the cake.

“There’s nothing wrong if you’re concerned about her well-being, Robert. I know you treat her as your sister,” Nana continued as she rubbed my back as comfort.

Krisha finally returned with a plate and fork. Then, Nana put two slices of cake on the empty plate. “Bring this to His Highness’s room,” Nana instructed, handing the plate over to her. “The princess is asleep in the prince’s room. Tell her His Highness sent this for her,” she continued.

Krisha nodded and put the plate and fork on a tray. Then, she went on her way.

I replied, crossing my arms on the table, “I feel like… I have no right to ask about her anymore. I do care for her, I see her as my sister. But at the same time, I’m fearful of the thought that if she found out that I asked about her well-being, she might misinterpret it. It could make her think that I’m in love with her when I’m not. She expects too much from me.

I never hated Mallory, even though she has managed to irritate and frustrate me for quite some time now. I still regarded her as a sister, a friend and my care for her will remain in me for the rest of my life. Whether she accepts it or not, I will continue to look after her as I always have.

“Have you tried explaining everything to her? She’s an understanding person, Robert. She has proven that countless times,” she asked.

“I explained everything to her, Nana, countless times. And during those times, I was patient with her, trying to open her eyes to the truth but her heart wouldn’t accept it,” I said. I took another bite before adding, “I never wanted to push her away. But her actions aren’t much of a help.

Nana put her hand on my arm as she looked at me directly. “There’s no need to torture yourself because of this. As a future king, you must accept that you can’t control everything. You have to have grace and understanding with anything that will happen in your life,” she explained.

I nodded.

She smiled as she touched my face, giving it a light tap after. “Now, are you going to eat more of this?” she pointed at the cake, not even half done.

I chuckled, “I don’t think I can have another bite, Nana. This cake is a bit heavier than the usual cakes you make.

She giggled. “I’ll cover the cake so if you get hungry again, you can always come back and have a bite. Unless one of the cooks got to it first,” she winked.

“Thank you, Nana,” I stood and kissed her on her cheek.

“Is there anything else that you would be doing today?” she asked.

Now that Nana has mentioned it, I haven’t planned anything today. Then, I suddenly remembered what Elizabeth told me, which was to go and give reading a try. It’s not what I really want to do during my spare time but it shouldn’t hurt either. “I would probably go to the library and read something.

“The library?” Nana’s eyes widened as she turned to me. “Why would you go there when you hate reading?” She then walked to me and put her hand on my forehead. “Are you sick? Is there something wrong with you today?

I smiled as I removed her hand. “Nana, I’m fine. I simply don’t have anything to do today and Elizabeth suggested that. I know it sounded strange, even I’m surprised that I came to this decision. I don’t know how long I will be able to bear the silence and endless sight of words.

“You will last, son. I’m sure you will,” she encouraged, putting her hands on my shoulders, which she pulled instantly.

I sighed and nodded. “I guess I’m going to the library, a place suggested by my sister who’s an incredible enthusiast of books,” I groaned as I made my way to the exit.

“I wish you all the luck and patience, young one,” Nana remarked. I let out an uninterested chuckle, knowing that my next destination isn’t something that I should be happy or excited about. The very last place that I would want to stay in - except for James’ study - is the library

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