——Aaron

“I still don’t understand why you can’t come with us.”

“I already told you. I have stuff to do, and my dad will be home for the weekend.” My morning at school with Nicole always had to be this way—her forcing me into her weekend plans which she obviously had arranged in advance without me. Of course, I wanted to spend time with her; she was my girlfriend in the first place but not this weekend. Or, any weekend when my dad is at home.

“But everyone’s going. This is the only time Trisha’s parents leave town. We will go.” It sounded more like an order coming from her plump mouth. I wanted to shut her up with a kiss. I closed my locker and looked around. I was sure people wouldn’t mind. And so, I kissed her.

Nicole returned the kiss immediately before gently pushing me away. I looked around. I was right. People didn’t care. Maybe they were used to it. But then again, why would someone object? Nicole and I were both good to look at. I could only sense their envy.

She smiled and lightly punched my chest. “Bad boy. So, you’re going?”

“No.” I shook my head. “I can’t, Nicole. Look, I want to, okay? But I can’t.”

She pushed a little harder this time. “Where there’s a will, there’s always a way, Aaron. Think of something.” Her voice came a little louder that people started to steal a glance at us. I loved attention, but not the kind of attention Nicole was drawing towards us.

“Nicole, you know my dad. You have seen him talk to me. You have seen him upset in the past. You should have a clearer understanding by now how difficult it is to deal with him.”

Arthur James Lanter was the type to say what was on his mind anytime, anywhere, and to whomever.

I eyed some of the students, giving them a look to mind their own business.

“He’s your dad. I’m sure there’s a way to convince him,” Nicole argued. She was wrong. There was no way. My dad was a man of purpose, and as his son, I was compelled to be like him; at least when he’s around and looking. Everything I would do must have a purpose. How I would spend my free time should have to have a purpose.

“Shouldn’t you have a license to be that ugly?” My mind must have drifted away for a moment because when I looked back at Nicole, her eyes were already shooting daggers at Sam who just happened to pass by.

Sam stood cluelessly. “Huh? Excuse me?” Her dark hair was looking unruly, as usual. She had tied her hair, but visible strands were sticking out to different directions. Did she even comb her hair before tying it?

Nicole faked a smile. “You find our lives entertaining, don’t you?”

Sam rolled her eyes and returned the fake smile. “I’d rather let the Annoying Orange entertain me.”

“Whatever, dork. Just because you forced your disgusting tongue down my boyfriend’s throat doesn’t give you passage to our world. It only makes you a slut.”

Nicole fired at Sam without any hesitation. I knew her too well. She was the kind who would always want to have the final stinging words.

“I don’t want to be a part of your pathetic world of superficial people. And I’ll be careful if I were you, Nicole. This slut can break every bone in your body. All 206 of it,” Sam retorted. Did she mean that? Maybe she was bluffing. But her bluff only pushed Nicole’s buttons.

“I’d like to see you try.” Nicole haughtily folded her arms and raised her eyebrow at Sam who showed no sign of backing down either.

“I don’t have to try because I know I can. But I won’t waste my time and energy on you because, in my world, you don’t matter. And I have better things to do like go to class and excel at something that is more significant.” Sam turned to me and said, “Here’s your assignment.” She walked out before Nicole could come up with a nastier comeback.

I looked around again and saw mixed expressions on everyone’s faces. No one in the entire school could yap at Nicole like that. No one could and no one dared, except for Sam.

“She’s doing your assignment now?” Nicole asked, glowering at the piece of paper in my hand.

“She’s my tutor.”

“What the fuck?”

I didn’t want to continue the conversation we had before Sam’s presence had interrupted us, so I quickly gave Nicole a kiss on her cheek and took off. I had more important things to deal with other than her complaining and yapping. I smiled, glancing at the piece of paper in my hand. I couldn’t wait to see the look of surprise on Mrs. Seymour’s face.

The class was almost full when I got to AP Lit. Mrs. Seymour arrived, and everyone took their seats. She started talking about Jane Austen and her contributions to the literary world. She dissected all four major characters from Sense and Sensibility and discussed two of the most important things in the story: logic and emotion. She then asked the class who were the Elinors and who were the Mariannes. I didn’t read the book, but I did read the summary of the plot on Google. If she were to ask me, then, I’d gladly answer Elinor since I consider myself logical in all aspects. But, right when her eyes met mine, and I was pretty sure she was about to ask me, the bell rang. She asked us to hand in over our assignments and dismissed the class.

I met the rest of the basketball team at the cafeteria. Nicole was already there, chatting with Trisha and Diane, casting scornful looks in Sam’s direction. Sam, on the hand, was buried behind a book with her friends: Powerpuff Girl and the two nerd guys whom I met when I went to request for a tutor.

As I let my eyes wander briefly at her, something inside me wanted to go to her table and say something funny to distract her and disturb her peace. But why? I struggled in my mind for an answer, and before I could even come up with something, Jasper called my name. I shrugged the thought of Sam off my mind and joined in the conversation with my friends. I spent the rest of my lunch hour talking about the upcoming game and how we could demolish the West Field High’s basketball team.

The rest of the day went by fast, and I was on my way to the boy’s locker room to change for practice when I passed by Mrs. Seymour’s. The room was already empty. She looked serious while reading the piece of paper held out in front of her.

“Mrs. Seymour?”

The expression on her face changed as soon as she saw me standing by the door. I walked in and smiled at her.

“Mr. Lanter, what do you want?” She never wanted to waste anybody’s time and asked direct questions. However, the way her eyes looked at me was suspiciously sympathetic.

I shrugged it off and excitedly asked her, “So, how did you think of my assignment? Good, right?” I knew it was Sam who wrote it, but I had looked at my situation with Mrs. Seymour’s class in a different perspective—I had to pass it, by any means necessary.

She pushed her glasses up her nose and sighed. “I think it was a well-written confession, Mr. Lanter.”

Confession? “Wait, what?”

“Mr. Lanter, it’s very brave of you to finally come out and accept the things that are beyond our control. I know you never chose this. And I understand how hard things are for you. I commend you for embracing your true nature.”

I never thought I would say it, but Mrs. Seymour was talking absolute nonsense. I didn’t understand anything that she was telling me. What did she mean by embracing my true nature? Was she pulling a prank on me? But she wasn’t the type.

“Here.” She handed me a paper that obviously was supposed to be my assignment, the one Sam wrote for me. A huge B+ was encircled on top. “You are right, Jane Austen’s works taught us to love ourselves for who and what we are.” And to add to the confusion, she gave a motherly smile. “Don’t worry. You can tell the rest of the world when you’re ready, Aaron.”

What could be stranger than your teacher smiling at you for the first time and calling you by your first name?

“Mrs. Seymour, I can assure that—”

“Aaron, a plane crashed this morning. No doubt that every passenger died. Don’t live your life by pretending something that you’re not. Life is short.” She smiled again and went back to reading and grading the rest of the stack of papers in front of her while I walked out of the room totally perplexed. I held the paper in front of me and started reading it on my way to the locker room.

… I had secretly wrestled with the same thing since I could remember. Confused and scared, I fought and shoved my true nature to keep myself safe from my father’s scrutiny and the society’s painful judgment. But Jane Austen’s book taught me to love myself for who and what I truly am…

…when his brown eyes bore into mine and I suddenly felt the odd sensation deep inside, I finally knew what I really am…

My eyes could no longer finish the whole thing. I now knew why Mrs. Seymour had suddenly looked at me the way she did. Why she finally smiled at me. Why she thought I was brave. She thought I was… I snapped out of it and angrily tore the paper into pieces. My chest heaved, my blood rushing to my head. I gritted my teeth.

“See you later, Banks,” I said furiously.