Have You Ever

I. I am lost

Here we go again, another oh so traffic day. Not to mention it's Monday on a rush hour. To think that I woke up as early as 4am to avoid this rush hour but hey, look at me. I'm caught in this freaking traffic. I guess what's bound to happen, it will happen. Well, what's new. If you want to graduate in a state university, you have to travel for two to three hours and fit yourself in an overcrowded bus even though you have to stand beside the driver. Yes, you heard it right. I am literally standing right now beside the driver and I'm having cramps because I can't move my feet even a bit or else I will lose my balance.

"Will you please move your leg? I can't move the gear properly.

Oh my gally Mr. Bus Driver! Don't you think this is too much? You are basically asking me to move as if there's a space for me to do so. But for the sake of safety, I gave my best to do what he asked for.

My uniform is so crumpled and my bag in front me was flattened. Poor self. But no! Let's not give up. In just a few days, you don't have to suffer from this kind of situation anymore. Let's look on the brighter side. Soon, you will be graduating so let's sacrifice a little bit more. In the name of diploma. Fighting!

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"Yah! Did you have a fight with someone else across the street or something? You look so... bad."

What a warm welcome from you Chae, really. Well, I do look bad with this crumpled uniform and with this messy hair of mine. Every passenger who travel from Cavite going to Manila is like a warrior who fights against any passengers or else, you won't make it to the bus and be late.

"Would you mind giving me that comb instead of stating the obvious?" I replied in a sarcastic tone.

"Here, drink some water. Have you eaten something for breakfast? Here, have some sandwich." The perks of having a very caring friend like Maita. A sip of coffee early in the morning will do because you'll never get hungry when you have a friend like her.

"Where are the others?" Chae asked.

Our circle of friends is quite unique and grabs a lot of attention, especially when we do games or laughs the best out of us, because we're eight (8) in the group. Usually, a group of friends were consisted of three (3) to five (5) persons but I have eight girl friends. And we simply call ourselves, The Girls. We started to become close when we were in our 2nd year college and became even closer as time goes by. I guess, we're sisters by heart from different wombs.

"They just bought something in the canteen because Ritz has been craving for the muffins and baked mac." Maita replied.

Today is the day that we are finally applying for graduation. We're done with the clearance and other requirements so we're just grad-waiting.

We started talking about our old days here in the university quadrangle while seating on the bleachers and staring at the sky for the last time. Reminiscing how our friendship started, those times when we were staring at the stars during break time from our night class. It's as if it was just yesterday. But here we are, finally going up the stage and grab the diploma, the fruit of our four years hard work. Finally, we will be a degree holder.

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CONGRATULATIONS BATCH 2015!

Today is the D-day that we've been waiting for. Wearing this black toga makes me feel surreal. I know this is what I've been waiting for but I just can't imagine that we are all bidding goodbye to our professors and fellow classmates. I guess it's time to say goodbye as well to the student discount in any transportation. Hello, jobless self! Welcome to the Real World!

While taking group pictures with my friends and other batch mates, they are already talking about the company where they will all work at. Everyone was already hired except me. Or maybe most of them but not me. Don't get me wrong. I also have good grades but, it's just that I don't know where to start. I don't know what should I do after the graduation. I don't have any plans ahead of me. I am used to just following what my friends do and just give a shot. I'm the go-with-the-flow type of a person. But being a young adult is quite different. Some would think that graduating and having the degree would be the finish line. But once you drop the title of being a student, the title of being jobless or unemployed welcomes you. The real journey has just begun.

I envy those who know what they want to do or who they want to be in the near future because they know what they are good at. I really envy those who know what to do to achieve what they want. Coz I, I don’t have any idea what should I do next after being a student. Of course, I want to have a job and to earn money but I don't know where should I go? What should I do next? What field should I aim for? I studied business for four freaking years but I don't have the capital to put it up. So what should I do with my life?

 I am lost.

Have you ever thought that being an ordinary human can be this difficult? Or should I say that being a young adult would never be as easy as what I thought it could be. Well, maybe it’s just me. Or maybe you're just like me? Hope it’s not just me.

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