ZYLITH.

"There was this one time when her hand slipped and the sword she was practicing with went out flying and..."

"And? What happened next? Come on come on, tell me! Fast!" I urged him with shining eyes, albeit he couldn't see my expression but I recon he could imagine how excited I must've seemed to him.

Alexteris and Reuben's mom seem just like the kind of mom I would die to have.

"(Chuckle!) And the sword flew out towards the head of the then grand chancellor who had come to discuss some important matters with my father. With a zapping sound, it went right pass above his head while carrying the wig he was wearing along with it. The man, who had a complex about his bald head was forced to stand there, solidified, like a hairless statue, while shaking all over(Chuckle!) At that time, we were only glad that it wasn't his head the sword went pass through."

"(Giggle!) I seem to like your mother more and more as I hear about her." I said with a snigger, "While my mom is more of a rational demon."

"R-Rational demon!" He knitted his brows, utterly puzzled as to what I meant.

"Yeah, she is like... I'll kill and die for you at one moment, and in the next moment she is like 'I'M NOT YOUR GODDAMN MAID AND WILL BURN ALL THE SHIT ON YOUR BEDROOM FLOOR IN A MASSIVE BONFIRE AND DANCE AROUND THE FLAMES IN GLORY AND RAGE' you know." I mimicked my mama when she morphed into 'The Momster.'

"Err... Haha... She seems... Fierce!" Alexteris commented sheepishly from the side-lines.

"Oh you can't even imagine." I sighed in lamentable melancholy, "I sleep too much, she complains. I don't sleep enough, she complains. Eat too much, she complains, and when I don't eat enough, she still complains. When I'm always in my room, she will complain, and when I go out too much, she will still raise hell and complain. It's like this, I can never win. No... scratch that! Me and dad can never win!"

"Uhh... Oh! She seems like a... very complicated person?" Even though I couldn't see Alexteris's expression, I could tell from his voice how complicated he must be feeling right now while hearing about my mum.

"Yeah! She totally is. you know, my dad compliments her perfectly. Like he is the official pacifier in the house." I said with a smile.

"Uhh... I see!"

"Mhmm! He is like the coolest dad ever. Not in a way like he doesn't have a backbone when confrontation comes his way. It's just that, he doesn't have a backbone only when it comes to mom. Haha... Otherwise, he even gave me a little shovel when I was in kindergarten and said, 'If someone dares to bully you, you are permitted to use this shovel to paste his face.' And when I said, 'But dad, I'm a girl.' He emphasized the shovel in front of my eyes and said, 'That's why I got you a pink shovel.'

I was giggling like a little girl while reminiscing the past while we sat laid back in the unanimous darkness, laying ourselves bare for the very first time.

"... Do you ever wanna go back to them?" He suddenly asked.

"Ah... Of course, I do. That is the whole reason why I'm still here, no?" I said in a light tone, seeming almost nonchalant but if one were to look closer, they would realize how much emotion this lone sentence carried. How could I not miss home. How could I not miss my family? I even recon my mom going bonkers because of my sudden disappearance. I imagined her haggard self and my dad's soothing hug trying to come her down. Tears welled up in my eyes as the melancholy of my world wrapped around me like a cloak I couldn't simply let fall to the floor, and though I held it so tight I still couldn't find the warmth I needed, yet it clanged to my skin. It was the anchor to my feet, the reason I couldn't find the surface or the sunshine, also the reason that had kept me going until now.

"At least you still have a place to go back to. Mine was burnt down and now lays in ashes, six feet under." He derided in a self-mocking tone.

For a moment there, I didn't know how to respond. All my struggle to not shed tears at my own pain had suddenly utterly been forgotten with Alexteris's words.

This was the first time Alexteris was opening up about himself. I don't know what it was that triggered this response, maybe it had been too long since he had suppressed his pain and insecurities that now it was unconsciously spilling out of his lips, or maybe we really were under a gabbing spell. I don't know. But what I did know was that his anger and rejection for me was nothing but a shield for pain, like a cornered soldier randomly throwing out grenades, scared for his life, lonely and desperate. He breathed in real slow as he kept speaking. I soon realized that this guy was just like me. He guarded himself from all the pain and sorrow he'd suffered with the shield of anger and indifference, just like I did with a shield of hilarity.

"... What happened?" I found myself asking, and he let out a long long sigh.

"... It was only a day after my tenth birthday. Mother was not feeling well, and all the physicians were claiming she might not last long if her health continued to deteriorate. I heard them talking to my father when I went to visit him to ask about my mother's health." So lonely and despondent was his tone, I felt my heart breaking when I was listening to him. "I remember myself running. Running to my mother, not knowing what else I could do besides being with her and spending my time with her as much as possible. The mind of a ten year old is pretty simple you see. I thought, if I couldn't have her by my side, if I couldn't hold her close and listen to her sing me lullabies to sleep, there was only one thing I could do, and that was to cling onto her as though my life depended on it." He scoffed at himself as he spoke.

"But then, in my mad rush, I bumped into the bane of my existence." His voice suddenly, took a turn from one of extreme grief to one of a maddening haze. So cold was his voice that I had goosebumps donning my skin. I felt his anger was like an impossible build up steam, burning him on the way out, as though taking a corporal shape all on its own. I had never seen anyone be so angry before. I didn't know who he was so angry at, but I did know that I wouldn't want to be at the receiving end of such anger.

"...The Queen Dowager... That woman... no, that venomous snake who ruined my entire world while wearing that same mask of hypocritical kindness over her vile face." He was shaking as he talked of her, his feeble frame shrouded in an aura of such raw emotions, it was almost discernable to the naked eyes. "I was a fool back then. I fell so easily into her two-faced act and actually believed she could help my mother."

"... It wasn't your fault. You were just a child." I humbly tried to console him, but he didn't look like he had heard me.

"The loneliest moment in someone's life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly as they are being ruined." He ridiculed himself. "All the more reason to mock myself when I was the one who brought forth his own doom." The darkness enveloping us was like settled dust. Our eyes had adjusted to its murky dimness. And in that gloomy dimness, I watched him, staring at his hands, which seemed to be trembling slightly under his intense stare as he said, "With these two hands, I mercilessly pushed her into death's door." He let out a humorless laughter right after.

I was shocked to say the least. To be honest, I couldn't make heads or tail of what he was speaking of. No... maybe I could. But I guess my subconscious was somehow trying not to draw out the impossible conclusion of what really happened that night eight years ago.

~••••••••••••••~

WHEN TOMORROW COMES

When tomorrow comes,

She knows you will say,

'It's all okay.

Those mistakes you've made along the way,

Amnesia all took them away.'

But when tomorrow comes,

She knows she will decay,

Under the guilt of taking your love, As though,

It was all 'for granted'.

And so when tomorrow comes,

She knows she will feel so small

As though she never deserved anything at all.

Oh how she wished,

She had made that one call,

But she knew she could not reverse the time at all.

And now when tomorrow comes,

The echo of your naked voice over the phone,

Keeps her up all night as she weep,

The ghosts of every remorse and regret,

Come haunts her in her sleep.

An Airhead, she was;

Getting lost in the sky and the stars,

But when tomorrow comes,

She knew you were her Heaven

Embracing all her flaws.

So when tomorrow comes,

Please don't let it all go.

Though love her so much as you may,

It is not all okay.

~••••••••~

By VICTORIC VAL||18/12/2020

TO HER DEAREST MOM