I have noticed some changes ever since Noah started putting me to sleep. My usual nightmares aren’t harassing me unlike before and I don’t frequently experience my headaches anymore. I might have it just like now, but it’s bearable this time.

It’s Saturday and I do my usual routines. I kept the house clean until Aunt Linda comes back. I watered the withering plants. I did my homework then read my notes for an upcoming exam. And then I went out to buy groceries. I called Emily to accompany me and she was very happy about it.

We are currently seated on a chair inside the café we usually go to and ordered our food. Then, we just started talking about random things.

“How have you been, Meredith?”Emily asked then she stuffed her mouth with the blueberry cheesecake she ordered. “Oh, this is really good! You should try it!”She spooned a generous amount of the cake then handed it over to me. I took it with my mouth then smiled at her as the delicious taste melted in my mouth.

“It’s really good, Em. But their tiramisu is still my favorite,”I told her. “And I am doing okay, I guess.”

“Really? That’s good to hear. How about your sleep? Are you still using Serenity?”

I nodded at her. “My sleep’s getting decent. And I don’t wake up in the middle of the night anymore which is really a good sign”

“You know that’s what I always wanted for you,”she told me knowingly. “As your friend, I can’t bear seeing you helpless knowing that I can do something about it. I’m really glad you accepted that card because if you refused that, I’m telling you, I’m not going to leave you alone until you take it.”

“I couldn’t ask for more,” I said then finished my remaining food. I looked at the food in front of Emily then I raised an eyebrow at her.“Do you need help in finishing all of that?”

She laughed at me but didn’t say otherwise. Instead, she offered me a jumbo plate of Burger and fries. I looked at it with wide eyes.

“This is not here earlier!”

“You asked for it then deal with the consequences.”then she laughed manically. Because of her laugh, I can’t help but chime in as well. And it’s been a while since I have laughed like that. We had so much that we haven’t noticed it was afternoon already. We walked together still talking about things until it was time for us to part ways. I walked for like a good five minutes until I arrived at my Aunt’s house.

I sat on a lone chair and rested my head on the table beside it. It was a very tiring day but it was worth it. It helped me to somehow divert my attention to my past with other things. It’ always nice to have a company. It makes me forget what I was supposed to forget. But then, I am alone again.

I deeply sighed and tried to close my eyes. But as I do, something in the cabinet caught my eye.

A picture frame.

Unconsciously, I stood up from my chair and walked towards the cabinet. I stared at it for a while before I decide to pick it up. It was a picture of me and my parents during our fieldtrip. I thought I kept all of our pictures already but it seems like I forgot to tidy this one. We look so happy and we didn’t care about anybody else. We were living our lives the way we wanted it to be. Everything was in place.

I can feel my eyes welling up as I stroke the faces of my parents from the glass of the frame. It’s has been a long time already but I can’t still forget that dreadful night. The night they were both taken away from me.

I clutched my chest as an overwhelming feeling came rushing to me all at one. Drowning me. Hurting me. Pulling me back to my nightmares.

I sat on the floor, still holding the frame, and let my tears flow freely from my eyes. It hurts. It really hurts that I wasn’t able to do anything during that time. I know I could have done something but I let my weakness get the better of me.

No matter how much I tried to break free from that past, I can’t because I am already tied to it. I try to be happy but I just go back to being sad. I try to sleep it off but it keeps on haunting me.

The happiness that I felt earlier was just a fleeting feeling. I knew it. I can never be truly happy because I’m not meant to be happy.

At this point in time, I may have not known what to but then whenever I feel like giving up, one name always pops in my mind.

Noah Delgado.