ERIC_

My tiredness made me hang limp like wet laundry on a cold still day. I felt like every muscle was giving into gravity. What I wanted was sleep, a nice warm bed and a solid night of dreams. But they won't let me have that. I couldn't have chaos outside and chaos in here too. I could feel the fear in my chest waiting to take over. Perhaps it only wanted to protect me from what's out there. It sat there like an angry ball propelling me towards an anxiety I couldn't afford to let loose. When anxiety and fear grabbed me by the tongue and dried my mouth, I didn't panic anymore. I've been there before, I knew the feeling, and knowing it makes it less scary - I was all the stronger from my battle scars. So instead of letting it take me down, I told myself everything will be alright. I reminded myself of her, the reason for my existence. I couldn't forget my goals, of the wager I made. I couldn't give up now. Fear can only hold me back, stop me from reaching them. I couldn't say it never comes again, but the taste of near victory made it a little easier. Saraphina was the answer to all my fears. To all my demons. And I couldn't deny the fact that I needed her desperately.

But I realized she was broken, but not unmendable. Even if she was, I was going to force her to heal. The way she was now, she was of no use to me.

"It seems like your cute little plan failed to work out." Helen and her annoying voice rang in my ears as she appeared out of nowhere. This fiend tended to do that from time to time, startling me that is.

"Shut up and be evil somewhere else Helena." I couldn't help grousing.

"Aww! Why so grumpy little Benny? I was just trying to comfort you out of your woes. Besides, you need about as much comforting as possible right about now." Her smirk was one that of a venomous snake that knew it bit real hard at the very right spot, "The clock is ticking my love. You don't have much time."

True. Time was what was of essence to me right now. Now that I watched time dissolving before my eyes like a mirage across the desert, I realized there was a time I never gave thought to all the time that enclosed my life into only a small speck in a timeline. In that time, I had so much time that I let it slide through my fingers like worthless pennies; so much time that I let it vanish like a magician in an act; and now I realized that I had so much time, and I wasted it all like it was nothing. And looking back at all my wasted time now, I couldn't help but regret it all, for today might be my last tomorrow.

Slowly but connivingly, she moved into my personal space and pressed her body against me. Her body soft and poised, yet held just the right blend of venom and wickedness within it. Her dark eyes, that of a predator was a bottomless pool of eerie darkness; her eyes were no longer human and I could not see any whites of her eyes nor the vessels that flowed through them. They were the depths of Tartarus holding a thousand souls within. "You would do so much better if you just came to me Ben." She slithered her hands under my shirt to feel me up with a look of beastly discern.

I grabbed her over friendly hands and ripped them off me in irritation. "Don't make me manhandle you Helena. It certainly wouldn't end well for you, I assure you."

She just tsk in annoyance and withdrew in sullenness. "Remember Ben, you can never escape fate. Not without me at least."

I decided I was going to change my fate the moment I signed the contract, and I was very far from giving up yet. Not yet!

~•••••••••••~

SARAPHINA_

"Who are you?" I asked him. He was still staring at me as if he knew me inside and out.

"Are you not Chelsea?" He seemed to mistake me for someone else. But the ache of familiarity was so powerful, I began second-guessing myself.

"No. My mistake," he shook his head into a sad smile. "It couldn't have been her. I am sorry I mistook you for someone else." His eyes had the kind of look as if the woman he was looking for was the beginning and ending of his world. Definitely a lover.

"Chelsea is my mother's maiden name." I said quietly. I don't know why I just said that.

"...I see...," Now he was looking at me with his feverish eyes. Definitely not a good sign.

I bushed profusely as I looked away. And I heard him chuckle. I couldn't help but frown at him, confused.

"'chuckle' Sorry! You looked so cute just now I couldnt help but laugh. I hope you are not offended."

"Ah! N-No, I-I don't mind." Seriously! I don't mind! How lame could I have sounded.

"Hmm! If you don't mind so much, maybe I could get away with asking for your name?" His bright smile was too blinding for my poor eyes.

"Ah! I-It's s Saraphina, Saraphina Valdez." Damn it! Why do I have to stutter all the time.

"...Saraphina. Fiery-winged, definitely sounds like you," His eyes were staring again. Telling me many silent tales of passion. And I couldn't look away from his mysterious eyes. It was as if space and time became the finest point imaginable, as if time collapsed into one tiny speck and exploded at light speed. It was only when he finally spoke that I was woken up from my stupor. "Nice to meet you Saraphina, my name is Ivan."

"Yeah. It's nice to meet you too." I managed a smile back.

"So, what were you doing here?" He asked abruptly.

"Excuse me!"

"'Chuckle' What I mean is, hardly anyone ever ends up here, how did you come to be here?" He improvised.

"Ah! That's 'cause I wasn't looking where I was going and was just sprinting away aimlessly."

"Meaning? Were you running away from something?" He frowned in inquisition. Damn! I was not supposed to let that slip.

"A-Ah, well...," I couldn't exactly say that I was running away from the most popular guy of the school because he discovered my secret and I ended up weeping like a pathetic baby in front of the guy since I couldnt control my emotions. And now I was too embarrassed to face the guy.

"It's okay if you don't want to tell me from what or rather from whom you were a making a run from. I wouldn't want to pry," He muttered in a kind but sad voice, a voice which almost made me wanna spill the beans.

"I...How about this, if you tell me your secret I will tell you mine." Again, what was wrong with me? Why was I going around making deals with random people all day today?

He seemed to contemplate for a second and nodded in agreement, "Hmm! Fair enough. Ask away whatever you wanna know."

"Who is this girl you kept mentioning earlier?"

And suddenly, he seemed lost staring into space. "Chelsea, you want to know about her?" I nodded in accord and he showed me a lopsided half grin. "Well, Chelsea was... Chelsea. She was not like anyone but herself and that's what made her special. Different and unique. That's how she was. She had that shy look young women often wear, but when she did she made it look different; not like any girl I've ever met, it was never morose. Always behind those slightly pursed lips was a smile just waiting to be tempted out. I never wanted to guess where she was from in case I got it wrong; I liked her. Sometimes she'd look my way and I generally pretended not to notice, too much interest and I thought she would run away. But when I did return her glances I didn't have to try to smile, it just came naturally. In those moments she would blush ever so slightly and I'd imagine her being mine. But it was never meant to be."

"What happened?" I had to ask.

He smiled that sad smile once more, "She left. I waited for too long to ask her out."

"I'm sorry." I mumbled quietly.

"Dont worry about it. We were never meant to be anyway." He showed the kind of smile which had a twist to it, like the smile of a child who was determined not to weep.

"Aren't you sad? You must miss her." He was smiling, but his pain, no matter how hard he tried to hide was evident.

"I promised her," he said, "I promised her and to myself that I wouldn't be sad and that I would love her unconditionally. I would love her until she saw her prison, and then I would simply open the door and let her fly. If she stayed I would make her the happiest bride in the world, but if she decided to leave I would let her go, safe in the knowledge that my love is evergreen."

I...I was speechless. How could someone love anyone so much so as to lose himself for her. For a moment, I was envious of this girl who still had his heart.

"Well now, will you tell me what went wrong with you for you to look so bummed?"

I couldn't shake off the feeling that I could disclose to him the darkest secrets of my life and get away with it. That he would just node his head calmly and console me into tranquility. This familiarity was uncanny yet soothing. Hence I did. I told him everything starting it with my dad and ending it with Eric Warnard. Except of the unnatural part of my life.

"...I see," he gave a slight node, "So this Eric Warnard is pinning for you?"

"WHAT! NO! There's nothing like that, he just wanted me to inspire him with my music." I said, flustered.

"Erm...Saraphina, if a guy asks a woman to be his muse it basically means he wants her to be his lover," He said with a teasing smile.

"No no, I definitely didn't see hearts sprouting from his eyes when he asked me," I shook my head in utter denial, more so to myself rather than to anyone else. I knew what I saw back then; desperation, pain, cold determination and maybe fear; but definitely not affection.

"Haha 'chuckle' ...you won't always see hearts in your pursuer's eyes. Some people aren't very expressive but that doesn't mean they are not interested. From what I hear, I get the feeling that he is certainly not someone who prefers to show off his real intentions easily," he said with his cute half grin.

"Erm...let's not assume things Ivan. This guy is not normal, so I don't want to assume stuff and make things more awkward for the both of us." I wanted to stop talking about Eric Warnard as much as possible; the guy had the ability to generally put me in a bad mood without even being there.

"...Alright, I understand. What do you want to talk about then?" Ivan asked sensing my foul mood.

"Anything. Tell me more about you." I shrugged.

"Hmm, things about me are not that interesting you know," He shrugged back playfully, making me kind of giddy with his easy-going demeanor. It had been a while since I met such a blasé guy. Everyone around here was so stuck up and stiff I felt suffocated under all the stares and pressure, so Ivan was like a fresh whiff of air to me.

"I don't mind you being boring, at least you're less boring than me," I smiled at him, in turn his eyes shone brightly, reflecting the warmth of the sun. I saw them smiling constantly, those beautiful eyes. I was sure, even if I tried I would never forget those happy yet sad eyes my entire life.

We talked all day, about all kinds of things. I soon realized that Ivan was four years older than me and was the son of one of the management staff of the school. And he was a very old fashioned guy who thought guys should properly court, mind you 'court', not date but 'court'(his words) the girl they like before they get into a deeper relationship; and he liked the kind of old songs my grandpa was crazy about. He was weird, but a good kind of weird if there ever existed the kind. Without me realizing time flooded through my fingers with no regards for my feelings. It was already evening and it was time of me to leave. It reminded me of my only friend May, back in Brooklyn when she used to rant about having less time to spend with her boyfriend even though they seemed to be glued together all day long, that she wished there were more hours than twenty-four in a day; I thought she was crazy and was being obsessive but now I knew better. I didn't know I could ever feel this way but I couldn't help wishing if only I could just stop moving forwards and exist in that moment together.

But alas! It was not meant to be.

As he was about to leave, I couldn't stop myself from running after him and asking, "Will I see you again?"

He gave me his cute lopsided half grin and muttered a 'maybe' before jogging out of my sight. I smiled to myself hoping to see him soon.

Back then, I didn't know meeting this mysterious laid-back boy was not a coincidence. I didn't know what I meant to him; what he would mean to me; that this would be the last time I saw of Ivan in this time.

I had underestimated the cold tonight, not like me at all, but I think I was just distracted with thoughts of Ivan to perceive much of anything at all today. I tried to sleep it off except a lingering haze of sleep sat somewhere at the back of my mind but was too far away to reach, floating in the pool of my memories of this afternoon. At that moment, I knew this was going to be a long night.

Moring came after a wait that seemed to take forever and quite reluctantly so, I lugged myself to class. My shoulders were slouched and I had a vague idea of what I must've looked like as I held myself like my upper spine was rubber, shoulders falling forwards in a way that would be more befitting a grandmother. Yeah, definitely a walking corpse.

Heading into room 246, I turned the corner and I stopped dead in my tracks. My eyes narrowing at the sight that welcomed me. Sitting in my seat, which was, in fact, in the far right corner, with his legs propped up on the desk in front of him and his head leaned back, resting against the chair, was none other than Eric Warnard. His eyes were closed, as if he might be taking a nap. It seemed, however, that I would have to address the issue myself. I was tired as hell and dealing with Eric Warnard was not something I was looking forward to today. 'Damn it! Why today of all days' I mentally sighed as I slowly made my way to the back of the room, coming to a stop a few feet away from my target.

It wasn't hard to find plenty mundane things about Eric Warnard. Like what he ate, what he liked. Actually, the problem was more so that people had too much to say about Eric Warnard. In a school like Verona High, people had too much free time. They get bored, and when someone like Eric came along, they gravitated to him like bees to honey. Though he kept swatting them off like annoying flies. So the lines between fact and fiction inevitably blurred as rumors flew around, eventually being exaggerated to ridiculous lengths. Needless to say, they hadn't been much help since they had failed to grasp the fun facts like he was into writing songs or once he set his eyes on you he will not let you off easy.

At this moment, I was so worn-out I didn't particularly care for the way my mind flat lined around him, "What can I do for you?" My irritation was evident in my voice.

"OH! You're finally here, I was starting to think you were gonna skip class today as well since you seem to be developing a habit of skipping these days." His smile was one of those super fake sweet smiles. As if he was the one to talk.

I couldn't hold back my sigh and said, "I already told you I can't help you with your inspiration thing. What more do you want?"

"Yes, you can. Only you can Phina." His face suddenly morphed into this puppy dog eyes person whom you find it hard to deny things. But I was hardly fooled.

"Phina!" I frowned at him, taking great offence in the way he twisted my name. It was too personal of him to address me like that.

"Yeah! Don't you like it better than turtle? Or would you rather I call you Turtle? I mean I don't really mind calling you either."

"NO!(sigh)...alright. Call me whatever you want since you're going to do it either way," I think I was sighing for the nth time this morning, "But I don't understand how I can help with your cause because you know, since I can't play for you."

"Oh! You don't need to worry about that." He now had an innocent smile on, which looked more menacing to me than his super fake smiles.

"Umm...may I ask why I don't need to worry about that?" I looked at him suspiciously.

"Because Phina, I am gonna take care of your phobia." His grin was so cheshire it was more as if he wanted to gobble me up rather than wanting to cure my phobia.

Oh God! What had I gotten myself into.

TO BE CONTINUED...