She Remembers

Scrolling through my smart phone to see if my Latin quote app was not updated. Last time I checked, it was well up to date, but this morning it was malfunctioning, giving me an English quote instead of the Latin ones I was supposed to get every morning.

It read, "There is no real definition of perfection, but if it truly makes you happy..then it is your own perfect" -source unknown.

I looked at the phone weird, the whole quote was questionable. Well crap! If I wanted English quotes, I'm pretty sure my English lecturer would take me up on the offer.

I always loved Latin, so getting a new Latin quote every morning, with definitions, made me learn it faster.

"Carpe Diem!" A deep Latin accent said, "meaning; seize the day!"

I smiled at the quote, it was perfect, first day of the semester..and I was planning to seize every second of it.

With that out of the way, I quickly got dressed, my roommate/best friend usually picked out our clothes together, she had a weird obsession with matching dresses.

"Annie! Annie!" I hollered at her so we could leave, we were running a little late.

"Calm your horses, this baby needs to look good, lots of boys to knock off their feet".

I rolled my eyes, it's not like she needs the make up, she is one of those African-american girls that looks straight out of a magazine without trying. I also am African American, but I do not look that hot all the time.

"Ok I'm done" Annie rushed past me, trying to get to the driver side of the car first. Rolling my eyes at her childish antics, I follow suit.

After parking, we separated when we got to school, our majors were completely different. First lecture was seriously a bore, I sat with my other friends, Sally and Audrey, we were friends since the beginning of our first year. We talked while the lecturer drawled on and on.

Once the lecture was over I began packing my bags, "hey guys, I need to go see Phoenix" I announced to them.

Phoenix was my boyfriend of two years, we'd been together since I started this college.

"Of course she'd ditch us, and on the first day of school too". Sally complained.

"I'm not ditching, I'm just going to spend time with him" I explained.

She rolled her eyes, "yeah whatever, I'm going to get lunch". I waved her bye as she left the lecture hall.

"Let's go, I haven't seen Phoenix in a while". Audrey said while holding my hands and dragging me along with her.

"Let me call him first" I said trying to get my phone.

"Nope, let's surprise him" she said, I nodded.

We traded holiday stories while we went, luckily for us, we saw his friends outside.

"Hey Oliver" I greeted.

They looked startled, which surprised me, since I was sure I didn't look particularly strange today.

"Let me go call him" Ken suggested I waved my hand dismissively.

"Don't worry, we came to surprise him".

They looked uneasy, that got me suspicious, I shared a look with Audrey and she nodded. We marched straight to the classroom, where Phoenix was supposed to be learning. Instead I found him with another girl that wasn't me obviously, dangling from him with her legs hooked on his waist, the image was permanently ingrained in my memory. Their make out session was so intense they didn't notice the two girls standing by the sides with mouths wide open.

Audrey was the first to recover from the shock and in three giant strides she was ripping them apart, and next thing I know she had slapped him so hard and turned to the girl that looked lost. I walked up to them, Phoenix looked shocked to see me, my vision was blurry but I could see the guilty look on his face, I looked at the girl and asked," since when?" My voice was shaking,

"Last two months..." The girl stuttured, I didn't blame her, Audrey looked threatening.

I laughed, a humourless dry laugh. I couldn't believe it, my Phoenix whom I trusted and loved and thought could do no harm.

"Angel I...I..." He stuttered, this time I slapped him.

"Fuck you Phoenix" I spat at him, my voice so venomous, I could not believe it. Before I could cry, Audrey took me out of there, where Oliver and Ken were trying to beg me. I walked out of there, and I immediately, I started crying, the weather that was cloudy, started raining too. I laughed and turned to Audrey.

"I think I control the weather, it's crying with me" I said trying to lift the mood.

"Don't try to crack jokes now Candy, you can cry" she said sympathetically.

I nodded and cried so hard, am sure no one has ever cried so much in their life.

My boyfriend of almost two years, Phoenix. Lots of people said we wouldn't last because of our age difference well I guess they were right, I always knew he was a flirt, but a harmless flirt. I didn't think he would have a whole different relationship aside from ours.

Was it me?, was I lacking?, wasn't I good enough? These questions plaqued me, I cried hard, I did everything expected of a good girlfriend.

Where did I go wrong?, why didn't I notice this? What if this wasn't the first time? What if he had done it before, and I didn't notice because I was too blinded by love? Why on Earth did I think I would be the one to change him? To make him into a gentleman. I laughed at how stupid I sounded, did I mean nothing to him though? Why would he want to throw away everything we had for someone else? I was drained and hurt. I felt a squeezing pressure in my chest, it hurt, it hurt so bad, I wanted to stop, I wanted it to go away. Why wouldn't it stop? I clawed at my chest and let out a heartracking sob. Welcome to my life where school resumes, and on the first day of school my relationship of almost two years ended, and to think next week was our anniversary.