Being the center of attention isn't something I have always enjoyed. As a matter of fact I never truly had to deal with situations like this but when you're friends with someone as crazy as Alice it steadily starts to creep into your life, especially in high school.

Thank the heavens that shit is about to be over really soon.

But what I'm not sure is going to be over soon is having to pretend to be a happy celebrant in an oxygen congested atmosphere filled with nothing but booze and booze and more booze.

Wasted teenagers whom I didn't know existed up until this day owning the place, screaming at the top of their lungs while playing bear pong, Edward forty hands and wiggling their boney asses in the air and above the table while the horny opposite genders cheer and bath their behind with colorful liquid to create better effect, coupled with the occasional "happy birthday Lex." Whenever they walk pass me.

I force a smile at the drunk weird looking blonde that comes running to me, a deafening screech escaping her lips as she jumps over my rigid frame, wrapping her arms over my body and Squeezing my cheeks like we've been long time besties. She opens her mouth and I nearly gag at the harsh smell of alcohol that oozes off her lips when she speaks, "zappy burffday gurllllll!"

My nose creases and my lips slightly curve downward discretely, "hi?" My words are dragged and all I can focus on is getting her wet hands off me. I can think of a million things she could have used them to do and none of those thoughts sit well with me.

"Wahh da laung face huh?" I catch a southern accent or maybe it's just the alcohol creating new talents in her system, "cam-oun it's ya day, y'all should be happy and shit like da! Issa great pawty! And ah think you could use ah few bowtles watcha say lot?"

"I say you need some water and a lot of rest. It's nice meeting you..." not bothering to finish that statement considering I have no idea what her name is and honestly don't care to know, I pry her hands off me and walk away only to hear her yell from behind me.

"Izz Sandyy!"

Who still bares Sandy anyway?

I keep walking trying to find a good place where I can stop to breathe for a moment, looking around on it's own brought a feeling of unease up my sleeves and as much as I hate to condemn my friends effort, I really just need to find my way out of here. But that ship just crashed the moment I bump into the hostess herself.

"Look who it is! The birthday girl!" Alice sings in my ears as she approaches me, her complete set of white pearls on display that glows brightly and complements the aqua marine dress she has on. Giving out the imagery of a mermaid breast cut that's vaguely connected to the lower mini skirt with just a thin line of fabric that stretches from the middle of her breasts and spine to her waist.

Her platinum hair is held up in a ponytail above her head and the twinkle of her eyes that suddenly look grey under the colorful lights blends perfectly with her makeup. She looks beautiful as always, much too revealing but perfect in every sense that is Alice.

She'd set this whole party up for me, taking 'her precious time' as she normally likes to say to set up the whole event. It is beautiful if I'm being honest, the club lights she'd planted on her balcony, all around the pool and on the Terrance, the time and effort she must have used to design the huge "Lexi becomes an adult" banner on fabric she hung on the entrance of her house, not to mention the amount of money she must have used to sponsor the whole thing.

I'm grateful for her thoughtfulness and effort, but all this just seems too much, it's never been my scene.

"Hey." I force a smile her way and let her engulf me in her embrace. Her addictive smell of peach and roses fill my nostrils and I slightly pull away watching her beam brightly at me "happy adulthood big champ."

If anything I feel nothing close to an adult right now. I thought when you grow up maturity is bound to grow with you? But as I play a recap on my previous decisions I feel the weight of that immaturity dawn on my back.

For starters, I completely went all out and made a mess of dinner when I could have handled all that drama differently and now Caroline might be shit faced mad at me to the point I didn't even get to see her the whole day or get a birthday card from her like I usually did in the past years. Or that I've been intentionally avoiding Kyle knowing the weight of his birthday text that sleeps in my cellphone sitting heavily inside my jean pocket.

I'm not ready to talk to him. Replying that text would mean that we'd eventually have to engage in a conversation and I'm not emotionally ready for that yet.

"Mona's been looking for you. She wanted to wish you with a gift but I asked her to keep it so we can all open them together you know? Just us girls!" She squeals "my entire room is stuffed up with them, didn't think you had that much friends" she teases, bumping my shoulder with hers. "We can go open them up now if you want, I know how much you hate crowds," her face contours into an apologetic expression "sorry about that, I didn't invite this much people but social media can be a bitch sometimes."

"Ali? Can I borrow your car?"

She frowns. Her browns knitting together and there's a flicker of sadness in her eyes.

"I just need a little bit air that's all." I backtrack, noticing the sudden change in her bubbly mood.

"Oh, okay.." she's hesitant but she pulls out her keys from the little purse hanging beside her shoulder and hands it over to me "here."

"Thank you!" I say grabbing for them and pulling her into a gripping hug then planting a light kiss on her cheeks before finding my way out.